funny stuff from tv

Okay Im so lame, Im blogging about funny and/or relevant stuff I heard on tv.

So.

LAST COMIC STANDING
I heard two yoga jokes so I HAD to make note.

Stretching to rap music. Its called Yo Yo Yoga.
Seth would like that I bet. Me, not so much. Okay, I'll give it an "eh".

This other comedian said how yoga was an entire hour of holding in a fart. That was funny. I've never farted during yoga though. Because I'm a delicate flower and I do not participate in such nonsense as farting. Especially during something as ancient and sacred as yoga.

CONAN O BRIAN

So during his monologue Conan says something like this: In California, a female figure skater told police someone slipped a roofie in her drink. She said she's not sure who did it, but she was sure it wasnt a male figure skater.

Okay I cracked up laughing.

But Conan's audience was silent. And then Conan starts laughing and says, "That did so badly, it amused me." And he says something about how after that joke was said, a quiet permeated the room that you cant get in deep space.
male figure skaters = gay. I got it Conan.

TV - good times.
[insert my typical tv disclaimer: i love tv but i dont spend my days wasting away in front of it. i watch less than 1 hour of tv a night. for sure, son.]

Last Comic Standing: Premarital Abstinence

Song about Premarital Abstinence from the Virginity ROCKS guy[s]

And so you've got a beau now -
A real life solider of God.
He's got a headful of Jesus Christ
And and all state quarterback's bod.
You've reached the age
when its time to get engaged.
You're a nubile princess in a tiger cage.
And he's trying to unlock you with his eager hand.
But you look him in the eye coz you know he'll understand.

You tell him "We're engaged to be married.
Hear the bells go a 'din' and a 'dong'
Let's not jump into bed yet.
For the pants come off ...
When the ring goes onnnnnnnn."

Not as funny as Santiri 4 Warrior Alien comedian guy. But still. A force to be reckoned with. I currently hope this duo beats out the twin are they guido guys.

Also, I learned that Last Comic Standing is soooo over dead baby/punching baby jokes. I guess once I start using it in my everyday vernacular ... it's not funny anymore.
I see how it is.

UPDATE

I found the Alien Senteri 4 guy on youtube THANKGOD!

http://youtube.com/user/AlienComedian

Praise the Lord Jesus he has a myspace too??

www.myspace.com/aliencomedian

(oh and he is from Satiri 4. EXCUUUUSE ME.)

I cant believe this is going to be what I blog about for my 100th blog post.

I could talk about my AWESOME RAFTING B'DAY TRIP!

But I'm going to complain and whine.

I CANT BELIEVE THAT ALIEN GUY FROM SENTERI 4 DIDNT MAKE LAST COMIC STANDING!!
I mean, yeah, he was gimmicky but they let the VIRGINITY Rocks duo in. How gay were they?

Ugh.

The white guy dancing badly was funny too.
But I guess white guys dancing badly really isnt that much of an oddity.