Should TLC own responsibility for thrusting Jon and Kate into immediate stardom and having their marriage fail?

WRONG, the correct answer is "who cares?"

I might want to be her

Im waiting for huge frizzy hair to come back in style.
But even if it did, I dont know if my kind of frizzy is ever cool. Hers is frizzy and curly and big everywhere. Mine is just randomly frizzy on top (ie, the flyaways) and then big on the bottom. So my head looks like a triangle. Hers is more of an "M". Or kitty cat inspired.

I also like how she's on a bike, with the boys, in some bright colors.

Yeah, I want to be her. I bet she can play the drums too.

great, now i wont be able to sleep

Every child fears under their bed. If they don’t, they fear the closet, or maybe that little crack in the almost closed door.

Scientists know that children are more perceptive, they see things adults don’t. They aren’t yet tethered into only accepting what society wants them to accept. They see what is truly there.

They see the monsters.

If you were to borrow a child’s eyes and see through them for a night, you would go insane. To be able to see what you only dimly remember, burrowing into your covers while wearing those train pajamas, hoping to a God you can barely comprehend that “it” doesn’t see you back…would drive an adult crazy. Because Adults forget the rules.

1) Cover yourself. If you can’t see it, it can’t see you. Even if it makes it harder to breathe.

2) Don’t make a noise. Every whimper can lead to destruction.

3) Don’t move. It attracts their attention.

4) Only light can make them go away. Bright light. Flashlights make it worse.

Teens are caught in the middle. They still feel what’s there, but they cannot see… and they forget the rules….

Why do you think there are so many insomniacs typing at their computers, subconsciously praying the light from their monitor will be enough to keep them away?

It’s not. Now look behind you with a child’s eyes and try not to scream.

How to fly

I, Niki, 100% stole this from someone's tumblr. But only bc I couldnt find the button to like it!

1. Sit on the back porch and contemplate your place in the world. Be loose and breathe deeply. Consider the weathering back fence in all its browns, greens and grays. Nature isn’t hurried, nor should you be. Things take time.
2. Starting at the base and working outward, preen your wings, taking pains to crush mites and lice between the nails of the thumb and forefinger. Pluck ancient or broken feathers to promote new growth.
3. Stretch. Limber up. Breathe deeply. (Now is the time when all the yoga you practiced earlier pays off. Make the lion pose. Now the serpent. Now the lotus. Relax.)
4. Leave the porch, lift your wings and grab the air. Though you may feel awkward at first, the rhythm will return as it returns to jazz musicians coming out of detox after a long winter kicking junk.
5. Once you’re gliding, forget your wings. Understand wings are illusory, and turn them loose.
6. Realize your body is an unnecessary illusion and let it return to the back porch. Soar above it.
7. All is illusion. Forget it. Let it go. Fly.

Dont read this if you're a guy

Hey so I think I've come up with a cute baby name. Florence Claire! Isnt it magnificent?!

Here are some ways to get Florence Claire's attention.
"Hey, Florence!"
"Flo!"
"Yo, Claire Bear"


Good idea. I know I'm full of them.

Checklist, please

My potential husband checklist for June 4th in the year of our Lord 2009.

- Flip flops are okay but SANDALS and CROCS are a big EW GROSS.

- Must wear a t-shirt under hoodies. People who dont wear t-shirts under hoodies send the message, "hey Im european and Im good in bed." Which translates into "I have many STDs".

- Must like to travel. Preferably with me. And not another girl ... like makeout buddies or "she's just a really hot friend, god you're so insecure!"

- Must sing better than me. (This shouldnt even be on here since everyone pretty much can sing better than I do).

- Must know more than me about cars. (Again, this is kind of redunkulous since I barely know what year my own car is & recently learned last year the difference b/n make and model).

- Must look slightly goofy while dancing at times. Guys too good at dancing are probably really good in bed and Im sure I'd disappoint so lets just stop this before it even happens.

- Athletic. Who is going to carry the kids when we go to the mall for our Saturday night dates? Those cretins are getting heavier these days!



Note: this list can change without a moment's notice including but not limited to the following: bad breath, clothing style, douchebaggery, political leanings, etc. I might like guys in Crocs tomorrow, who knows?! Life is like a barrel of fish! And that previous statement had nothing to do with the statement before it! But Im not budging on the height thing! No guy shorter than like 5'8" or something. Okayyyy, fine. 5'6" BUT IM NOT GOING ANY LOWER!

kinda want

Lookin Boy Hot Stylz Featuring Yung Joc

Blame It Jamie Foxx featuring T-Pain

Was it something I said?

I dont mean to be selfish, but I'd totally appreciate if people would stop moving away from me.

And they arent moving away to different cities. No! Its different STATES! I know. I'm scribbling their faces out in yearbooks, ward directories, journals, etc as Im typing this.

SBZ, Ashley, yes Im talking to you guys. Brian too but he kind of doesnt count since he's probably moving away because of his new roommate.

I met a famous person

Not really, but if there ever was a Kevin McCallister (Home Alone) around, I think I found him and he's 27 and lives in GA.

Kevin McCallister: Is this toothbrush approved by the American Dental Association?
Clerk: Well, I don't know. It doesn't say, hon.
Kevin McCallister: Well, could you please find out?

how do you learn these things if Chinese history isnt taught in the schools?

I invited a coworker out to eat sushi with me yesterday. And she's Chinese. And apparently she doesnt like sushi because its "Japanese". Excussssee me. How was I supposed to know they dont eat sushi in China?!

Foodie faux pas, my bad.