broke

how awesome is life?

I have $2.01 in my checking account. Until Friday.

Suck.


I havent been this poor in over a year.
I had to pay out like $1000 for my insurance and then I bought my bike for another $500, all in the same month.
The insurance I HAD to pay. And the bike was a last minute, ill thought out purchase. But I didnt want to wait until like June to buy my bike. Then I would have had to learn all my commuting things during July. The hottest month ever. I'm okay with being broke for 3 days. I can deal.

Even though Im broke:
tonight - going to SBZ's house and watching a movie/eating asparagus.
thursday - going to a braves game with my parents and assley.

and i need money this week why?

friday i'll probably watch a netflix with ashley ... so its not like i'll need money that day either.
oh and on saturday assley and i are going to the pool to get some super sun.

i think that i'm going to get really bad farmer tan from commuting though. on the weather channel, they said that today we'd have a high UV index. like there's too much awesomeness of sun. i believe that lack of sun contributes to depression. so the sun makes me happy until i get cancer.

okay and the sun and cancer just got me thinking about sunblock, which leads me to insect repellant. Over at the terry's house, they had the awesomest insect repellant ever! It seriously smelled like lotion I would buy from bath and body works.

this is all.

opening day genesis

Speaking about how much soccer sucks, I got free tickets to the braves game from one of my bosses at work.

In honor of them giving me the honor of having the honor of attending a braves baseball game here is something i stole from the internet.

In the big inning, God created Heaven on Earth. And it was without form, and void. God separated the dirt from the grass. He called the grass Outfield and the dirt He called Infield. God made the Infield a 90-foot square and the Outfield not less than 400 feet to center and 320 feet down the lines. He declared this Fair Territory. All other territory, God then declared, was Foul.

And God divided the players into two teams of nine players each, under direction of a manager, to play The Game on His field. God called some of these players Pitchers and some of them Hitters. He placed a Pitcher precisely 60 feet 6 inches from a Hitter. Then God commanded that it's one, two, three strikes you're out at the ol' Ballgame.

And God granted jurisdiction of The Game to lesser Gods, whom He called Umpires. God said the Umpires are infallible, blessed with Heavenly authority, whose judgment is not to be questioned under penalty of expulsion from The Game. And God looked at his creation and He was pleased. Then God created the Infield Fly Rule to confuse nonbelievers.

And God said, Let there be light beer, and there was. And, God said, let there be peanuts and hot dogs and overpriced souvenirs and let there be frosty chocolate malts with little wooden spoons that you can buy nowhere else except at this Heaven, which God called a Ballpark, and there was. God looked at His creation and it was good.

And the Lord God formed, from the dust, a collection of elite players in His own image. The Lord God then breathed the breath of life into His creation. God called this creation the National League.

And God said, It is not good for the National League to be alone. The Lord God shall make it a mate. And thus, while the National League slept, God took several of its top players and created the American League.

And God blessed The Game, saying, Be fruitful and multiply. Put teams in every city with deserving fans, God added, even if this occurs at the expense of starting-pitching depth.

From time to time, God understood, The Game would be corrupted by the Serpent. The Serpent was more cunning than any other beast and he would take many wicked forms: the Black Sox,segregation, the Designated Hitter, the Reserve Clause, dead balls, juiced balls, spit balls, corked bats, George Steinbrenner, AstroTurf, the 1981 strike, collusion, lockouts, Pete Rose, the 1994 strike, greenies, cocaine, HGH, Andro, steroids, $20 parking, corporate mallparks, Scott Boras, Donald Fehr, and Bud Selig.

But, God said, the goodness in The Game shall always prevail. As needed, the Lord shall bestow upon The Game a Savior. And the Savior, like the Serpent, can take many forms. The Savior shall remind Fans how blessed The Game truly is. The Savior shall be called by many names, including Cy, Matty, Honus, Big Train, the Babe, Wrigley Field, Fenway Park, Lou Gehrig, Branch Rickey, Jackie Robinson, Buck O'Neil, Hank Greenberg, Red Barber, Harry Carey, Vin Scully, Jack Buck, Satchel Paige, Bill Veeck, Roberto Clemente, Ernie Banks, Hammerin' Hank, Cool Papa, Dizzy, Lefty, Whitey, Stan the Man, Big Klu, the Say Hey Kid, Campy, Duke, the Mick, the Splendid Splinter, the Gas House Gang, the Big Red Machine, the Damn Yankees, Pudge Fisk, Pudge Rodriguez, Yaz, Pops, the Wizard of Oz, Fernando, George Brett, Moonlight Graham, Roy Hobbs, Wild Thing Vaughn, Bingo Long, the Ryan Express, Donnie Baseball,
Rickey, Eck, the Big Unit, the Cactus League, Cal Ripken, Tony Gwynn, Camden Yards, Rotisserie Drafts, Web Gems, Derek Jeter, Dontrelle Willis, Vlad Guerrero, and, from the Far East, Ichiro. And, God guaranteed, there are many more to come.

God looked upon His creation and He was very pleased. And God spoke, yelling, PLAY BALL!

By Glenn Birkemeier

LOL at the bottom 10.

Fox Sports had this to say about Mr. Andruw Jones.

(10) Los Angeles Dodgers: It's pretty obvious that they were Jonesin' for the wrong Atlanta Braves mainstay when they parted with $14.7 million. Andruw Jones, 31, carried a .162 average with 1 homer, 3 RBIs and 25 whiffs in 74 at-bats into the weekend, has looked chunky since arriving at spring training and has added less to the lineup thus far than a cymbals player in Nine Inch Nails. You would have thought L.A. might have taken the hint when the career .261 hitter fell off to.222 in his walk year. Meanwhile, Chipper Jones is tearing the cover off the ball for the Braves for $12.3 million.

And I'll throw in the one about Starbucks owner Howard Schulz too.

(1) Howard Schultz: The founder, chairman and CEO of Starbucks is suing to undo his sale of the Seattle SuperSonics to Clay Bennett's Oklahoma City group 21 months ago because he says he was fooled into believing the NBA club would remain in the Pacific Northwest. The suit asks that the club be held in trust until an "honest buyer" can be found. I know Bennett said at the time and in several instances since that the Sonics would stay put, but let's not lose site of the fact that it's now his company and he should be able to run it as he sees fit, although honoring the last two years of the Seattle lease would be nice. Schultz should be focusing on Starbucks, which has seen its stock price plunge by more than 50 percent in the last year, and be grateful no one has sued him for charging for Wi-Fi access in his stores on top of $4.50 for a cup of coffee. God bless Dunkin' Donuts.